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BRITAIN’S twisted geniuses might have invented Love Island, I’m A Celeb and the Big Brother sex jacuzzi – but now the Aussies are ruling reality TV.
When it comes to saucy scandals, drama-loving producers Down Under are making many of our shows look a little, well… dull.
Sexed-up Martha Kalifatidis and Michael Brunelli made Married At First Sight a must-watch
While the UK version of Married At First Sight gifted us slippery Ben Jardine, the hit Aussie version has a whole galaxy of gloriously loathsome stars.
And with Love Island Australia about to kick off on ITV2, there’s another dose of rampant romance that’s set to put the likes of Paige and Finn’s cutesy courtship in the shade.
Even I’m A Celeb Down Under has sizzling jungle romances and snakes that try to bite your face off.
So how are the wizards of Oz turning our favourites into TV gold – and what does it mean for our own shows? We take a look…
Married At First Sight Australia
Jessika Power has been starting fights and breaking hearts on MAFS AustraliaCredit: E4
The show, which airs on E4 each night, has made stars of the likes of Tamara JoyCredit: Instagram
The British version, here showing Michelle and Owen, involves much less screamingCredit: Channel 4
Across Britain, 7.30pm each night has become a sacred time for reality fans thanks to Married At First Sight Australia.
Unlike the British version, which is engaging but cosy, this hit has been packed full of bed-hopping, double-crossing back-stabbers.
And, in a twist set to be replicated in the UK version, all the contestants are regularly jumbled together to battle, cheat and steal each other’s partners.
Amusingly, the mayhem unfurls in front of a team of experts who pop up from time to time sighing worthily about how the “experiment” is going wrong.
Come on folks, we’re not buying that for a second – more drama, more!
Love Island
A raunchy new series of Love Island Australia is about to start airing in the UKCredit: Channel Nine
The reality hit’s last winners had sex just two hours after coupling upCredit: ITV
Grant Crapp and Tayla Damir got down to it on a sun lounger – but he had a dark secretCredit: ITV
Love Island has only run in Australia for two series but they’ve already captured the sort of drama the UK hasn’t managed in recent years.
Dubbed “horny as hell” by Brits used to the more chaste antics in the homegrown version, the Aussies waste no time getting down to it.
Last year, Tayla Damir and Grant Crapp had sex within two hours (yes, hours) of coupling up – in the same room as their exes.
They went on to win the series but it later emerged Grant had a secret girlfriend the whole time he was on the show. Crapp, indeed.
Couples having sex on Love Island Oz is much more common than its British counterpart
Anna and Josh wound up having a very steamy shower on the show’s 2019 series
Viewers of the UK version were treated to Paige Turley and Finn Tapp’s courtshipCredit: Rex Features
And they were by far the only contestants to have sex on the show with producers making things easy for them.
As well as the usual Hideaway on hand, bosses have been known to clear the whole villa so couples can get down to it.
Islanders Anna McEvoy and Josh Packham found themselves with the place to themselves when they woke up in Australia’s 2019 series.
They headed to the bathroom and had one of the dirtiest showers the show had ever witnessed.
I’m A Celebrity
Charlotte Crosby had a jungle romance with Ryan Gallagher on I’m A Celebrity AustraliaCredit: Refer to Caption
TV star Toni Pearen was left sobbing after being bitten on the nose, cheek and faceCredit: Channel 10
The British version most recently crowned mummy blogger Giovanna FletcherCredit: Rex Features
Everyday life in Australia is like a Bushtucker trial, what with snakes in the loo and spiders in the shoe.
So no wonder the version of I’m A Celeb that airs Down Under is rather more extreme than ours, where celebs squeal at the sight of mealworms.
Last month the host of Australia’s answer to You’ve Been Framed staggered out of a challenge smeared in her own blood after being repeatedly bitten on the face by pythons.
Try that with Giovanna Fletcher my snakey friend and you will be hearing from her agent.
And while the UK version’s last decent celeb romance took place under the Tony Blair government, Aussie camp snogs are so regular even Charlotte Crosby got involved last year.
Too Hot To Handle
Aussie Harry Jowsey spiced up Too Hot To Handle with stunning Francesca Farago
The pair demolished all the others with their passionate love affair on the Netflix series
Netflix’s grab at the reality TV pie was made by Brits and stuffed with Americans – but it was an Australian who stole the show.
Harry Jowsey from Brisbane ignored the jealous cries of ‘you’re punching mate’ and went all-out to bag Kim Kardashian/Kendall Jenner hybrid Francesca Farago.
Ignoring the central premise of Too Hot To Handle – that contestants had to keep their hands off each other – they kissed, cuddled and had sex, costing the group £32,000.
Go on, Hazza.
The Bachelor
Nick ‘Honey Badger’ Cummins refused to choose anyone on The Bachelor in AustraliaCredit: Channel 10
The Bachlor flopped in the UK as the prospect of dating first Gavin Henson and then Spencer Matthews failed to excite viewers (truly a mystery).
But in Australia the show has been a sensation, with public outcry over one recent series raging for weeks.
Nick Cummins, a former rugby league player nicknamed the Honey Badger, refused to pick any of the women on the show.
He also did the opposite of most British reality stars and ran away from the cameras, using his old job to good use by fleeing the set. A true Aussie hero.